putting on a brave face

To be honest, that first post took me a long time to get up courage to write. I made my account almost a week before I posted anything. I would step into the post-writing-room on my comp..... write a few sentences and think "This is super lame. Who would read this crap?" And then I would delete it all and walk away.

I was trying so desperately to think of something interesting about my life that others would be interested in reading. But then I realized that I don't actually really even care (or at least I shouldn't care) whether you find this interesting or not. Its my life, and it is what it is. So... I am just going to write about my boring life. And you can follow along if you like.

Today I have to suck some courage to put on my swimsuit and go to the pool. Uggg. I actually really despise public pools. So many people, and I have to wear a little spandex-y suit in front of them all. Not really my idea of a good time. But the swimming part... now that is something I LOVE!!!!! I registered to take my NLS re-cert at the end of May, so I really need to start swimming.

I love swimming, and running, and going for nice long walks. Sometimes I have company, and I love that. To have someone to talk to while we walk (normally its just the walks where I am accompanied - its not much fun trying to communicate while swimming lengths, I don't know enough sign language). And most of the time it is my dear DEAR friend Jodie who is always smiling and laughing. I believe that these walks are actually very therapeutic for me. We talk about silly things, and serious ones. We talk about our lives, jobs, and walk with God. It is so encouraging for me to have someone walk with me (literally and spiritually) who pushes me to be better in all aspects of my life.

There are also MANY times where I walk and run (and swim) on my own. And in those moments I find myself calling out to God. In prayer, in questions, in thankfulness. I run away my fears and frustrations and come back feeling alive and full. And hey! I am getting exercise at the same time as I fill my heart! BONUS!

Life isn't always easy, in fact.... is it ever?! haha. But think about it... if life was easy, uncomplicated, and painless, what would we have to look forward to in heaven? So I today I put on my brave face. I will step into that pool with confidence, despite my disgust for bathing suits. I will be suck up the courage to ask the tough questions (even when I am pretty sure I won't like the answers). I will love those who are difficult to love. I will follow God even when it doesn't make any sense to me. I will do these things because God has something great in store for me. And I can't wait to see what he is going to teach me next.